Chip Tsao’s Cheap Shot

The article below was published in Hong Kong and a lot of Filipinos reacted in anger with some over-acting  politicians riding on the issue asking the Philippine Government of filing a diplomatic protest of sort.  Whoa!

I say, don’t get MAD. Get Even.

The War at Home
By Chip Tsao

The Russians sank a Hong Kong freighter last month, killing the seven Chinese seamen onboard. We can live with that-—Lenin and Stalin were once the ideological mentors of all Chinese people. The Japanese planted a flag on Diàoyú Island. That’s no big problem-—we Hong Kong Chinese love Japanese cartoons, Hello Kitty, and shopping in Shinjuku, let alone our round-the-clock obsession with karaoke.

But hold on-—even the Filipinos? Manila has just claimed sovereignty over the scattered rocks in the South China Sea called the Spratly Islands, complete with a blatant threat from its congress to send gunboats to the South China Sea to defend the islands from China if necessary. This is beyond reproach. The reason: There are more than 130,000 Filipina maids working as HK$3,580-a-month cheap labor in Hong Kong. As a nation of servants, you don’t flex your muscles at your master, from whom you earn most of your bread and butter.

As a patriotic Chinese man, the news has made my blood boil. I summoned Louisa, my domestic assistant who holds a degree in international politics from the University of Manila, hung a map on the wall, and gave her a harsh lecture. I sternly warned her that if she wants her wages increased next year, she had better tell everyone of her compatriots in Statue Square on Sunday that the entirety of the Spratly Islands belongs to China.

Grimly, I told her that if war breaks out between the Philippines and China, I would have to end her employment and send her straight home, because I would not risk the crime of treason for sponsoring an enemy of the state by paying her to wash my toilet and clean my windows 16 hours a day. With that money, she would pay taxes to her Government, and they would fund a navy to invade our motherland and deeply hurt my feelings.

Oh yes. The Government of the Philippines would certainly be wrong if they think we Chinese are prepared to swallow their insult and sit back and lose a Falkland Islands War in the Far East. They may have Barack Obama and the hawkish American military behind them, but we have a hostage in each of our homes in the Mid-Levels or higher. Some of my friends told me they have already declared a state of emergency at home. Their maids have been made to shout ‘China, Madam/Sir’ loudly whenever they hear the word “Spratly”. They say the indoctrination is working as wonderfully as when we used to shout, “Long live Chairman Mao!” at the sight of a portrait of our Great Leader during the Cultural Revolution. I’m not sure if that’s going a bit too far, at least for the time being.

Since talk is cheap and Chip Tsao is cheap, I will also talk cheap.

Even if he is a Chinaman with very little gray matter in his brain and probably have very little understanding of Confucius’ teachings, I can still invoke the Golden Rule in dealing with him-

“Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.”

Or better still, why not the Biblical teaching of  “an eye for an eye, a tooth for  tooth” instead?

Nah, since his publisher, the ever sensitive and politically correct HK Magazine invoke satire in their defense of him–

Let’s do it their way then- satire for satire!

So, what if a Chinaman named Chip Tsao called the Philippines a “nation of servants” in his lousy column?

I’ll take earning an honest keep any day over the moolah  in Mr. Chip’s pocket whose progeny is quite suspect. For all we know, the food that Mr. Chip feeds himself or his family does not come from real green sources. Rather it came from very dirty polluted sources.

Hong Kong for all its lights and splendor on the surface cannot hide the fact that deep down its belly, it is one of the biggest sources (if not the conduit) of all the illicit goods that floods the world market today. It is the junkyard of the world literally and figuratively.

Human rights as well as Intellectual property rights are never heard nor respected in the Hong by the Kongs. Greed and piracy is the name of the game in Hongkie Town. And we are not even talking about China here, the world’s leading manufacturer of cheap and  toxic goods.

The itsy-weenie-yellow people’s  idea of  world domination  is  by LEADing the world into destruction. They’re very adept in misLEADing us about the safety of their products. Made in China, if you ask me,  is always synonymous with substandard, filthy and LEAD-laden products.

Hence, the Philippines may be called a “nation of servants” but we can also say that Hong Kong is a “Colony of Thieves” and “People of  Substance (Toxic)”. And it is a fact.

So what if Mr. Chip and his ilk gloat in the fact that many of our countrymen clean their toilets and windows and what have you?

At least, we are teaching them how to clean their stinky and dirty nests if not practice proper hygiene and helping them realize that Cleanliness is next to Godliness.

But since Hongkies like Mr. Chip are notoriously filthy in their lifestyle, we can be sure that they will continue to flood the world with new stuff that is only unique to Hong Kong and its inhabitants  such as SARS, Bird Flu and the like that we Filipinos are not capable of. I guess centuries-old filthy habits will never really die down  in Chinatown.

But this I say to you Mr. Chip and your ilk,

We may be mere servants in your myopic eyes and therefore has no rights in your clouded perception but history shows that when push comes to shove, servants do get even with their masters in so many ways,–

Beware of the lowly servants in your household for they may be meek and smiling yet they can also be wicked and knows how to get back at you in a subtle and not-so-very subtle way.

We can always pee in your tea. The adage, ‘if it’s yellow, let it mellow” is so true you know? Remember that even if it is Green tea you like, I will guarantee that we will always find a way.

And if tea is not your cup of tea, then we can always put boogers into your coffee. It will be so tasty that you will never know what went through your filthy mouth when you slurp that last drops of cappuccino or mocha inside you.

We can always glaze your Peking duck with our ear wax until it shines so bright that will surely whet your appetite.

And we have the knack for the odd job and the nose to improvise and do some pretty spraying and sneezing and lacing those noodles of yours with plenty of oodles.

Don’t mistake this for a figure of speech but We do have the power of spit, too. You may  find those orange and slimy phlegm sliding and rolling in your calloused tongue. You may also end up shoveling  those  green and sticky gunks from our throats into your smelly  piehole  without second thoughts.

And then when you are finally full, sated and bloated. The “mineral” water in your glass may come from the porcelain “well” where you flush all your inhibitions down. Recycling is so in nowadays that we can always practice them for you. So, be careful of what you wish for?

Last but not the least–

WE can always dip your toothbrush in the loo.  Nyahaha.

FHM features BeBe Gandanghari?

The pictures below were emailed by a friend claiming that erstwhile matinee idol Rustom Padilla who recently changed his name to BeBe Gandanghari to suit his “new” life and personality is featured in FHM Philippines March issue.

His coming out of the closet is really a  life-changing transformation for Mr. Padilla. But I’m a bit perplexed on the name,  Gandanghari.  Isn’t Gandangreyna more appropriate?

So, who do you think is prettier between this Bebe or his former babe, Carmina Villaroel? You be the judge. hehehe.

Are You Kidding Me?

I know this is old but as I said just before I went on a long sabbatical a couple of months ago that I will post a follow- up on  both Jun Lozada’s  and Brian Gorrell’s allegations against some people.

I will tackle Mr. Gorrell’s tale in the future. Let me just focus a bit on Mr. Lozada’s saga for now.

Recently the Court of Appeals junked his petition for a Writ of Amparo saying that there was no proof that he was kidnapped nor threatened by government officials. I’m glad the Appellate Court saw from where this charges were coming from and acted on the best way possible, to throw them out into the junkyard.

I will not go into some kilometric details since a lot has been said about Mr. Lozada’s alleged abduction. You can just Google them or look in YouTube if you want to be refreshed about the contentions of the protagonists.

I am just probably just one of the few who did not buy his statements and pronouncements at face value, even then. More so, now.  Let me just state that I gave him the benefit of the doubt at first but his actions, time and events have now shown what the reality is, that Jun Lozada had taken the entire nation for a joy ride.

Those who bought his statements where either too naïve on how the wheels of politics in the Philippines works or just hated PGMA and her ilk too much that they were blindsided by Lozada’s theatrics.

But Mr.  Lozada’s flair for the dramatics notwithstanding, he was able to put a really good show for the entire country if you ask me, but it was also proven to be his fifteen minutes of fame and downfall at the same time.

Anyway, on his accounts alone that he was “kidnapped” yet was able to use his cell phone and text his family and friends as to his whereabouts as well as ask his kidnappers to bring him to a place that he prefers (which is La Salle Greenhills in this case) make his story not only doubtful but highly improbable. This is the first time that I ever heard of a kidnap victim giving his relatives and peers a live blow-by-blow account of his supposed whereabouts and ordeal in the hands of his “kidnappers” as well as prod them to deliver him to a safehouse that he prefers.

And yet by another grace of God (actually, brotherly love from the La Sallian brothers) he was  able to call for a press conference while still in the hands of his alleged kidnappers makes the event even more suspicious; a fact that  did not escape the eyes of the Justices of the Court of Appeals, a fact that will never hold water in any court of law much so in the court of public opinion. His handlers could have done a much better script that will not insult the intelligence of the majority of the Filipino people, if you ask me. But it was good while it lasted, a welcome respite I should say from the humdrum of our daily lives.

Here’s a YouTube copy of the video where Mr. Lozada is supposed to have been abducted against his will by unidentified men upon his arrival at the Ninoy Aquino International Airport.  Enjoy!

The Jun Lozada & Brian Gorrell Stories

I

In the first quarter of the New Year, the Philippines were shaken by two earth- shattering scandals that involved personalities many Filipinos love to hate.

One is political in nature which involves powerful individuals including the husband of the President of the Philippines himself, the retired Comelec Chairman and a bunch of other well- connected people accused by a person who claims to be in the know regarding some anomalies worth in millions of dollars in what is now known as the ZTE/ NBN Scandal.

Jun Lozada who claims to be a close friend and associate of former CHED Chairman and now NEDA Director General Romulo Neri and was a constant presence in all the meetings with regards to the said project had a sudden change of heart while in Hong Kong and decided to tell all his knowledge and involvement in the anomalous deal.

The other one is a personal crusade by a jilted lover who claims to finally had an epiphany and is now exposing the so- called rampant drug use and other immoral acts in the Philippines’ High Society committed by the so- called Gucci Gang in his personal website.

Brian Gorrell, an Australian is the author of the blog wherein he proclaims that he is just trying to collect his money back, all $70K of it from his erstwhile lover, DJ Montano one of the members of the gang whom he accuses of stealing his lifetime savings. He decided to put up his tell- all blog to pressure the Gucci gang to force this ex- partner of his to pay- up the money in question.

Messrs Lozada and Gorrell claim to be insiders in their respective circles and both claims to be in the know  about the shenanigans of the people that they used to rub elbows with. As of this writing, they already spilled some of the beans with regards to their former friends and associates ‘ unwholesome activities and promised to continue to do so until they attain the kind of outcome that they desire.

They also claim that what they’re saying is the truth and the whole truth and nothing but the truth so we should believe them and take their words for it. For a lot of people, their words are Gospel truth and they can do no wrong and hastily condemned the objects of their accusations to be guilty beyond reasonable doubt.

But to people like yours truly, who always want to see the evidence and hear the arguments first before forming a conclusion and joining the bandwagon, I need more supporting facts than what they already delivered at face value.

I will be analyzing and scrutinizing their accusations as well as the pieces of evidence that they presented against the people that they’re accusing of wrongdoings before finally passing judgment on the said issues.

So, keep me company as I embark on my journey in search of TRUTH and uncover the pretenses and lies as well as the smokescreen that these protagonists employ to advance their cause.

Abangan…

The NBN/ ZTE Chronicles Episode I

An article by Isagani Cruz published in his Philippine Daily Inquirer column on February 24, 2008 is a mirror of the way many so- called enlightened Filipinos sell their not-so-worthy views to the public.

This is another example of an “expert” opinion maker peddling his version of the gospel truth when the truth of the matter, he didn’t even know nor bothered to search for the “real” truth.

Had the good award-winning writer and PhD now conveniently at home in the Court of Public Opinion bothered to exercise one of the basic fundamentals of common sense, then he should know that contrary to the norm that he is used to, he needs to read the entire transcript or at least watch the entire proceedings on TV before arriving to his conclusions.

He could have save us the time of reading his one- cent take on the issues surrounding Mike Defensor’s relationship with “NBN/ZTE whistle blower” Jun Lozada that is based purely on hearsay, incomplete texts, conjectures and insufficient evidence.

If this is the way he arrives at his dissertations during his time in those prestigious institutions on the way to his PhD, then God Bless all the people who in one way or another went under his pen and style; for it is not the way to ferret out the truth. Or  maybe in his current state of mind, he just confuse his facts with fiction.

Here’s an excerpt of his article entitled Fairy Tales in the Senate-

It is significant that when in the course of their conversation, he learned of Lozada’s financial need, he asked his wife (as if he didn’t know) if she had any money on her. She said yes and gave him a sealed envelope that he handed to Lozada, who said he received but did not accept it, instead turning it over to the religious brothers for safekeeping. The envelope was opened at the hearing and was found to contain a wad of bills that Defensor said totaled P50,000. (Different from the P500,000 from Manuel Gaite, but that’s another tall story.)

I am nonplused that the investigating Senate, with many lawyers in its ranks, not to mention its other members who were equally interested in Defensor’s role in the thickening plot, did not think fit to ask some relevant and curious questions about his mysterious generosity.

Did the money come from Defensor’s magnanimous fortune or was it given to him by some anonymous benefactor to deliver to Lozada for some unannounced reason? Whatever its source, why were the Defensors carrying it along the dark streets knowing that hold-ups are common in Metro Manila even in broad daylight? Was it customary for Ms Defensor to carry big amounts of money like that, probably as mere petty cash to be treated as some loose change only? If it was intended for some special purpose, perhaps the purchase of a safe, why was it necessary to pay for it outside regular office hours? Although Defensor said he first asked his wife if she had some money on her, why did he accept the sealed envelope without first checking its contents and readily gave it to Lozada like kuwarta o kahon? Wasn’t this like a well-acted scene in a Viva film by the bida and his leading lady? And, yes, why did our hero bring his lovely wife with him—a wisp of a girl to act maybe as his bodyguard—during that nocturnal adventure?

These are suspicious circumstances that make Defensor’s sworn statements during that hearing too ridiculous to deserve intelligent acceptance. Any fair-minded judge at a proper trial would give short shrift to such a testimony and simply dismiss it as an affront to the truth that, in that Senate hearing, Defensor crudely dismembered.

The sworn statements of the other administration witnesses who “escorted and protected” the restrained Lozada and drove him around aimlessly for hours while waiting for instructions from above on what to do with their shivering captive are of the same putridity as Defensor’s fairy tale. The intelligent public cannot be easily duped by such palpable falsehoods

It is funny how the very intelligent PhD arrived at his conclusion when it’s plain and simple that he did not do his part or even if he did, he obviously suffered from a very serious case of omission which is a no-no if one is indeed after the truth and nothing but the whole truth.

For the uninformed, Mike Defensor testified in the Senate that he and his wife came straight from their daughter’s birthday party, so by that admission alone explains the presence of his wife in La Salle Greenhills where Lozada’s police escorts brought him for “safe-keeping”.

Besides what’s wrong with Defensor’s wife by her husband’s side when visiting a “friend” to support him after his “ordeal”? It’s an old- age Filipino practice, if you ask me.

Only people with malice and suspicious minds will impute that Mr. Defensor’s wife is part of the grand plan to buy- out and silence Jun Lozada. To me, it’s just a friend trying to help another friend in dire straits.

Also in our culture, the wives are usually the last ones that the macho Pinoys will involve in  “dangerous situations or wrongdoings.”  Pinoys are very protective of their wives that’s why I don’t buy the notion that Mike Defensor will allow his wife to be part of such plan if there is indeed such a plan.

As for the money, most Filipinos prefers to carry cash even at this age and time of the ATM Cards, you can only withdraw certain amounts from them machines.  Ever heard of the daily limit on withdrawals that the banks imposed on the ATMs?  Isn’t it more convenient if you have money at the ready for any eventuality rather than risk getting stuck in a long line at the ATM machine?

This is not to mention the fact that Defensor already talked to Lozada earlier and learned that his “kumpare” was short on cash. Any good- willing kumpare, if he has the means will not hesitate to do what Mike Defensor did for a kumpare. I’m sure once in our lives, a lot of us have in one way or another did a similar deed for a friend in need.

Although in the end, we can deduce that Lozada did not really need those “pamalengke” money since he also asked his boss, Lito Atienza and Undersecretary Gaite for more money. Gaite, a former seminarian and his kababayan from Bicol heeded his pleas and gave him through his brother who signed a receipt for the amount of 500, 000 pesos earlier. If it was indeed hush money how come Mr. Gaite asked Lozada’s brother to sign a receipt for the said amount?

No matter what Lozada and his handlers say and do, it is very clear that his actions was a classic case of a set- up job in order to support and implement their devious plans.  In doing so, he betrayed his well- meaning “friends”  who were only too willing to help him out of his predicament and that by doing so, in their minds they’re also helping the President in  way even though they don’t know the real situation behind it.

I think these government officials were just all over- eager to be in the good graces of the President because they thought Lozada indeed has the “Bomb” against the First Gentleman’s involvement in a very big scandal!

Of course, we all know by now that that is not the case, since Lozada as of this writing has been exposed to have been in contact with Senator Lacson’s people all along and up to this very moment have not shown us any documents nor any other pieces of evidence to support his accusations and claims.

If Mr. Cruz who is refuted to be a Filipino with a very keen eye and sound mind by virtue of his being a PhD and an award- winning writer can be swayed by obvious propaganda, what more the “ordinary” Filipinos who make up the population?

I say, everything that is happening right now is just part of the dirty game that is politics that we Filipinos are very sick of but very adept in playing.

I say, if Mr. Lozada had the goods against certain people in the government, then better bring his case to the proper forum and let them stand on its own merit and not engage in innuendos, gossips and warrant-less accusations in the media and in the senate at the expense of taxpayers money.

I say, if he has the goods then do what is the right thing to do otherwise he should shut up.  He just can’t slander people left and right and get away with it if he can’t even back it up with one single piece of evidence.

I say, bring it on and let the full force of the law take care of the rest.

Note: To all my readers in the old BungangAraw, it’s good to be back. This is my first blog entry here in WordPress. In future blog entries, I will continue writing without fear or favor. I will  tell and say it like it is, even if my opinion will be against the views of the majority or the noisy few.